Feeding the Ducks!

I am convinced that all the stupid people on this island hatch a plan to find me, and make sure that I have a daily intake of stupid! I am a very sarcastic person, and many of my answers can be taken in the wrong way, however, some of the things that spill out of my mouth, surely you would know was a joke!

When people are allowed through my gates the first thing they see is the duck pond, well the disgusting green swamp that doubles as a duck pond. The oooooo and aaarrrrr's usually happen next as they see ducks. The questions then start and how I answer depends on my mood that day,

So when a woman asked why I have ducks I replied " because I'm too lazy to go and feed the ducks at the park, so stole them all and brought them here" "great idea wasn't it, save son petrol, time, and effort, I simply grab a bag of bread, perch my arse on a rock, and voile, instant entertainment"

At this point I expected a laugh, or something, but she stopped looked at me, and simply said "WOW what a great idea, how long did it take you to catch the ducks?"  For a split second I thought she was playing me at my own game, but then I realized she wasn't that intelligent.


Can the UFO that dropped these stupid people, make a return journey and collect them now please!